monsters ball 2

A skipperless team smokkelaars wends its way to Willunga in two groups. gunner's going solo while Doc and Van Dutch cruise in the commodore, no doubt ruminating on slaying the Willunga monster on consecutive weeks. A monster slain holds no fears - for the prepared. A text from skip emboldens and a promise by gunner that "today We Ride As One" is sent in response. The early signs are not good with gunner mangling a valve while disengaging the pump. Exit air. Fifteen minutes pre start and the
spare tyre is already employed. Meanwhile Van Dutch is dealing with a flat tyre in the car park. Doc's late dunny run once again sees team smokkelaars embark with the peleton nowhere in sight. Will we ever catch this bus? From Willunga the lure of the sea beckons like the sirens in Homer's Odyssey and Van Dutch has been hopelessly seduced by their call. A 40+kph rip on the latent downhill run with a suspected but undetected trailing breeze. Doc and Gunner hang on with grim intent. Early ride banter is sparse under Van Dutch's cruel tutelage and Gunner's thoughts, even at this early stage, are on the Willunga widow maker. smokkelaars with Van Dutch leading all the way hit Silver Sands to reveal the snaking sands of Adelaide's southern beaches. Hugging the esplanade, wedged between water and Willunga, then Aldinga we relieve Van Dutch of the onerous task of leading. The cycling gods then smile upon us as smokkelaars are visited by two lycra nymphs. Van Dutch gets onto their
back wheels and Doc and gunner require no further invitation. Suddenly the coastal vision splendid seems superfluous. Imagine, we could follow this all day - and Van Dutch had a plan. But plans come awry and a tactical error sees team smokkelaars pulling in for refreshments at Port Willunga as the two nymphs disappear into smokkelaars' cycling folklore. Star of Greece is the scene of a Greek tragedy as gunner strikes a puncture in the new tube. The sympathetic comments from cycling grey nomads with their thick-walled, puncture-proofed, steel radials are of no consolation. If a race can be lost at the starting grid or in the pits then smokkelaars surely know the feeling. A nice downhill run into Maslins Beach is no time for naked ambition as we turn into the previously undetected but suspected wind. Bring it back a few cogs and find a cadence that suits. California Road, wind over the left shoulder and a straight stretch to find the legs. Formation riding in silence, bordered by stressed vines. A swing into Willunga for powerade, cake, and confidence as the sea is now a whisper and the Willunga
monster a roar - guttural. For gunner it's 3kms out of the seat as the cannondale gearing shows no respect for the climb. Doc and Van Dutch demonstrate kharaktaar riding in tandem and with the summit reached gunner takes responsibility for the tempo. From Hope Forest to Kuitpo gunner takes smokkelaars for 20kms at 32kph - Van Dutch sitting shotgun and the doc tucked safely in behind. This road tears and the resonance of rubber on bitumen roars with efficiency - smokkelaars in the zone. skip would be proud. The radiata pines of Hope Forest and Kuipto scent the way as we reel in the stragglers and leave them in our wake with the road bisecting Dowie Doole and the conifers. They've neither the legs nor the kharaktaar to board this mini bus. A nasty incline bites gunner's quads as cramp's deadly grip seizes the opportunity to remind him to respect the road. Confidence shaken gunner tackles the climb seated: grinding hard. Passing Kuitpo Sawmill is smelling salts to the ride-addled mind. Freshly sawn radiata soothes the mounting fatigue. Refreshments at the 70km mark with plenty of fuel taken on board. Soon after there's another unexpected climb - this course has teeth. On completion gunner announces this should be the last of the pain - only to be gunned down in unison by Doc and Van Dutch with smokkelaars' doctrine: 'there is no truth in cycling'. A suitably chastened gunner now finds his proper place in the team. The last climb has brought us together with a couple of soloists who join smokkelaars to form a handy group. There's comfort in numbers. Tails up, enthused by our additions and treating the gently rolling downhill run with contempt we attack Kangarilla Road with all we've got. Sitting snugly together, riding as a team, and splicing the shadow-riddled road we pour on the 45+kmh tempo. Exciting stuff - mini breakaways, team pursuits and exhilarating speed. Satisfaction. The speed abates as the road flattens then undulates before the gentle incline back into Willunga. gunner feels he has kept his promise to skip to 'Ride As One'. Deregister, eat, and contemplate the conditioning required to go another 100kms on the final Grand Slam challenge. Good coffee and debrief on the main drag. Doc discussing the tipple and Van Dutch suggesting that it's unadvisable that smokkelaars become tipplaars(?). More could be said about this but remember - what happens on the road stays on the road.

Ride approx 95km
Time approx 3:30

Regards
Gunner